[side-ways glance] what am i supposed to do with this word?
like how i hate the saying God never gives you more than you can handle. i don’t think this is true at all, i think we’re given things in life because of how other people’s choices have ripple ramifications that can echo far beyond what they even thought or considered, into lives of strangers and beyond; bouncing back from edges that may never come back to the center.
i do firmly believe that God is with me as people’s actions have direct consequences in my life, but i can’t buy into false security of God not giving me more than i can handle, because with the type of God i believe in, who gives us/allows us free will we are responsible for our actions and those actions in turn effect a lot of things, in so many ways. i can’t see the whole picture. sometimes i trick myself into thinking i have to answer the why of things before i can believe but now i know that’s not true.
but i haven’t experienced the soul suffering of some people in some of the ways they have been torn apart. and in other ways i have experienced suffering that still others don’t really understand. my life is sheltered and yet not. depends on your perspective. i do have to say that i am thankful because God has brought me through quite a variety of life lessons, experiences and mistakes, failures that really took a toll on me for longer than i should’ve let them. and i take too much responsibility for actions that are not even mine to answer to. so that’s something, a portion, that i can let go and move on from.
sweet, sweet relief.